Activities, workshops, and classes are a great way to meet people quickly. The nature of the activity or course forces engagement with the other participants and will help turn everyone into fast friends. You also have a ready-made icebreaker in the activity itself!
Group meetups usually happen each month and will probably include generally the same people each time but with a few new additions here and there.
Good invitations to accept are ones involving parties with big crowds. These include birthday parties, holiday parties, housewarmings, weddings, among lots of other functions. This is a sure-fire way to meet lots of new people and potentially make new friends.
Remember to be safe. Don’t disclose any personal information about where you live or how to contact you. Use your discretion about what you put on the Internet and make available to the world.
Looking for opportunities to reconnect with people you once knew casually is a great way to build new friendships quickly. You already know something about each other so it’s not like you’re building a friendship from the ground up. In general, it’s easier to turn people you know casually into real friends than it is to meet someone totally new and build a friendship.
Ask your friends to bring someone they think is cool to a party or social gathering and have them introduce you. Chances are that if you like your friend, you’ll probably like most of your friend’s friends too.
Start with something easy and casual, like how she knows the hostess if at a party, or whether she got caught in the rain that day. Once the ice is broken, making a real and more meaningful connection will be easier.
Doing all these things at the same time sends out a good vibe to the people around you and shows them that you are someone worth being friends with.
Intersperse questions with statements or comments. For example, when they tell you what they do for a living, maybe ask them a question about how they got into their careers and then share an anecdote about how you got into yours.
These statements might be something like “I don’t know about you, but I’d die for a burger right now” or “I think we can both agree that this DJ is the worst, right?” Research has shown that talking like friends is important to making “fast friends,” so to speak, because it creates a sense of interpersonal closeness. [11] X Research source
For example, let other people know about one really incredible thing you’ve done - like climbed one of the world’s tallest mountains or lived for a year in China. This might capture their interest and make them want to talk more to you.
Try telling a story about something embarrassing or funny that happened to you. One good type of story to tell would be one that is very relatable, such as a story about getting lost when traveling or rushing to get somewhere. Usually everyone can relate to these types of stories and this is one way to start building a sense of connection between you and these new acquaintances.
Begin by asking something that is just slightly personal. Make sure that you relate the question to what you are currently talking about. For example, if the other person is discussing an unpleasant phone call she recently made, ask, “When you make a telephone call, do you rehearse it beforehand?” After your new friend answers, it’s your turn to reveal something personal about yourself, such as “I actually practice a bunch of times before I call someone I don’t know that well. ” Don’t ask questions that are too personal too quickly after the beginning of the conversation. This can be perceived by your conversational partner as off-putting and unpleasant. Start off easy and work towards more personal questions. After around 30 minutes of talking, you can start asking deeper questions, such as “What is your most terrible memory?” or “When was the last time you cried in front of someone else?” By starting with the easier but still personal questions, the progression to deeper and more probing questions will be more natural because there will by that point be an established sense of closeness as more and more information is revealed. Other questions used by researchers include: Would you like to be famous? In what way? When did you last sing to yourself or to someone else? Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die? If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be? If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?[15] X Research source Remember to reveal as many personal things about yourself as your new friend is telling you. If you are also sharing about yourself, the other person will become more comfortable opening up to you. In the end, you’ll have a new, close friend after 45-60 minutes![16] X Research source
For example, maybe you both love the same TV show and are the only two you know who actually watch it or maybe you both are in the same profession and can talk shop with each other about your daily trials and tribulations. Finding these moments is what brings a friendship to fruition. Of course, this connecting means that you have to open up about yourself, even perhaps the things that you don’t usually like to talk about (like your parent’s divorce or a childhood illness or trauma). You don’t have to reveal everything at once, but once you do you’ll realize that it can be refreshing to talk to someone and have them accept and embrace you. Be sure not to draw away from the other person if they want to have more deeper conversations. Remember that friendship is about giving and receiving. [19] X Research source
Don’t be bummed out if you don’t start hanging out all the time. With some people, you might fall into an almost immediate routine of seeing each other all the time. With others, the one-on-one time might be less frequent due to work, school, family or other commitments. Making the effort to make plans is what’s key here. This step is ongoing. You need to keep spending time with someone to make a friendship strong and lasting. [20] X Research source
Don’t overdo it. Don’t be a needy friend. Give them a bit of time if they don’t write back immediately; not everyone texts all day, every day. Once you have a better sense of how your new friend communicates, keep in touch in a manner that respects their boundaries. [21] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source Do, however, show your new friend that you care. For example, if she mentioned at your first meeting that it’s her birthday the following week, send her a ‘happy birthday’ text or email. This shows her that you cared enough to remember and starts to establish you as a legitimate friend who remembers the important things after only a week!
Plan fun outings and trips together. How often have you heard of people doing on a camping trip together who are at first casual friends and then come back and seem to be a tight group? It’s time to make your own “Remember the time we. . . " stories.
You don’t have to be perfect but you do have to try, especially with new friends.
